In enough time to celebrate The Girl’s first Christmas, The Father returned home. Alfred was no longer the man of the house, which was a relief, because he wasn’t very good at it.
He never drove The Mother around.
He wasn’t interested in watching any movies.
He didn’t offer to cook or clean.
He refused to change diapers.
He made himself scarce when bathtime rolled around.
He didn’t help hang the new shower curtain or install the new towel rack.
… He didn’t do much of anything, really.